Shopping for Things in Uganda

Among my responsibilities here at the church is the oversight of its facilities which can be difficult at times.  Let me explain.  First of all, knowing where to go to purchase anything is a challenge in and of itself.   Secondly, most Ugandans have very little technical knowledge about what they are selling.  As far as customer service is concerned, well, let’s just say it’s pretty non-existent.  To give you an idea of what it’s like, here’s a fun quiz based on my experience:

1.       You see a large sign for “Tropical African Ventures, Ltd.”  What type of business is this?

A.      A store for kitchen and bathroom fixtures

B.      A travel agency

C.      A safari company that does game drives

2.       You see a large sign for “Deep Enterprises, Ltd.”  What do you expect this business to sell?

A.      Well drilling equipment

B.      SCUBA diving equipment

C.      General merchandise

3.       Zion Research Institute is located in the city of Jinja.  What type of business do you expect this to be?

A.      Internet café and photocopying

B.      School of Judaic studies

C.      The research arm of the Jewish Historical Society of Uganda

4.       Uganda has its own Yellow Pages.  What’s it like?

A.      Delivered to every home yearly!  The online version lists every business in the city, big or small.

B.      I’ve seen one paper edition since arriving here… it’s eight years old

C.      The online version only lists major businesses and the phone numbers listed may be missing a digit or two

D.      Both B & C

5.       Missionaries in Uganda have their own Facebook group.  What do they usually post?

A.      Restaurant reviews

B.      Questions like, “Does anyone know where I can find a….?”

C.      Photos of what their kids are doing this summer

6.       People stealing toilet paper from the church’s restrooms is a big problem, so you decide to install lockable holders.  There are about ten bathroom and shower fixture stores in Kampala’s industrial area.  What will you find?

A.      Each store sells a wide variety T.P. holders some of which are lockable

B.      Every store sells the same two models of T.P. holders, neither of which is lockable

C.      One store used to carry a lockable T.P. holder, but they are no longer in stock

D.      Both B & C

7.       The church’s photocopier is broken.  Kampala’s only Konica/Minolta store says their technician is out.  You leave a message for the technician to call you back.  What can you expect?

A.      The technician will call you as soon as he’s back in the store

B.      The technician will call you back within 5 minutes from his cell phone and schedule your repair ASAP!

C.      Better do your photocopying elsewhere because nobody will call you back.  You’ll need to call Konica/Minolta every day until you reach the technician (typically 3-5 days after the first phone call)

8.       Every door at the church has its own key, far too many for the maintenance staff to manage.  You ask the guy who does lock work for the church to change the locks so they can be opened with just one or two master keys.  What can you expect from him?

A.      He will change all the door lock tumblers since he’s gone to locksmith school for technical knowledge like this.

B.      He has never heard of using a “master key” and doesn’t know how to change a lock’s tumbler and he only knows how to install locks and copy keys

C.      He says it’s expensive, but he can do it

D.      He says that he knows a locksmith who can do it

Answer Key:

1.       A

2.       C

3.       A

4.       D

5.       B

6.       D

7.       C

8.       B